Abbie Freeman was illiterate until the age of 13, when a dyslexia diagnosis at high school changed everything. Now, having recently graduated with a first-class honours degree in Film, Media and Journalism, she’s just made a short film for the BBC.

I come from Kemnay, a village in Aberdeenshire. Growing up I was home-schooled. My undiagnosed dyslexia made it difficult for my parents to teach me, so reading and writing were just something I avoided. I really struggled because I couldn’t put my thoughts or knowledge on paper like other kids my age. It was embarrassing and I just thought it was my fault. I was stupid.

Dyslexia diagnosis

When I was 13, I started high school and was diagnosed with dyslexia. Initially, I took that news quite badly. I was upset. But soon after it felt like a relief. The diagnosis took the pressure off me in a lot of ways. It gave a reason as to why I was struggling so much. It felt like it wasn’t my fault anymore, it was just something that was a part of me. I learnt more about dyslexia and found out that many successful people have the learning difficulty. In many ways, it can actually be seen as a strength.

Going to university

In fifth year, I became really focused on going to university. I attended an open day at Stirling and set my sights on studying there. I went to a presentation by the head of the film and media course, Dario Sinforiani and Janieann McCracken. The industry connections and practical nature of the course appealed to me.

Although I was worried about how I might cope at university, I was given great support. I accessed funding to buy a laptop and printer, extra technologies to help with my learning and additional support tutors, who – especially in my first and second years – were hugely helpful. When I felt overwhelmed, they gave me practical tips about notetaking and referencing. I saw how I was improving as my grades got better every year and I didn’t rely so much on the support.

Working with the BBC

In my fourth year, my course mates and I got the opportunity to meet senior journalists from BBC Scotland’s current affairs series ‘Disclosure’. They taught us about documentary making, investigative journalism, different storytelling techniques and how to ‘pitch’ your ideas to a commissioner. It was incredible to learn how many of the BBC team had studied at Stirling too, including Disclosure’s editor, Shelley Jofre, who is someone I really admire. It was inspiring to learn about their career journeys.

We got the opportunity to pitch our own ideas for a short documentary to the Disclosure team. This exercise is built into the course assignment. Although we were told there was a possibility of your idea being commissioned, it wasn’t promised. After the assignment, we received feedback from the BBC journalists and continued to research and develop the original pitch.

Reluctant to open up

I had always aspired to create something that highlighted my own journey and addressed the stigma associated with not being able to read or write, but I never thought that opportunity would come so soon!

At first, I didn’t put forward this idea. Maybe I felt reluctant to open up and be so vulnerable.  But, after some reflection and watching the documentary ‘Do I have ADHD?’ which was made by a Stirling student and broadcast as part of the same partnership, I thought ‘What am I doing? Be vulnerable!’ I have a strong link to this topic and have the opportunity to tell my own story.

After we got the commission, myself and my team set about honing the idea with the help of our mentor Calum McKay from Disclosure.  We worked as actual journalists reaching out to different organisations and academics to ask them to contribute to the programme. In May, we started filming for a 16-minute documentary for the BBC Scotland series.

During filming, I met people seeking support as adults to learn to read and write. Their individual stories were moving. I could see how difficult life is not being able to carry out everyday tasks, like filling out a form or reading an important letter. From early research, I quickly understood why it’s harder for adults to tell someone that they are struggling because of the stigma associated with illiteracy. I hope that the people I met are proud of themselves for getting the help they need to continue their learning.

I feel very grateful for the support I had had at school. Through the documentary, I found out that currently a quarter of Scottish state primary school pupils aren’t meeting expected literacy rates. In poorer areas, you are 20% more likely to struggle with literacy. Children with low reading and writing skills have poorer life satisfaction, coping skills and self-belief. Perhaps I was only able to access the support I did due to my postcode or the year I was born.

‘What if I can’t read?’

‘What if I can’t read?’ was released on BBC iPlayer on 26 August. I did lots of press to promote the film, including a live TV interview on BBC One’s Breakfast show. It was an amazing experience.

It made me realise how far I had come. For a long time, I kept this whole part of me a secret – even my closest friends had no idea how much I had struggled –  and now I had told my story on TV. It’s been met with such warmth and positivity.

I’m now in my first month of a traineeship with the production company Hello Halo through TRC Rad Scotland – a programme created to encourage more people from under-represented backgrounds to start careers in the TV industry.

I felt ashamed for so long. Now I take a lot of strength from overcoming the challenges I faced. I had a tough start to education but my journey has given me incredible motivation and a fierce work ethic.

What support is available to me?

If you are thinking of applying to study at the University of Stirling and would like to find out more about the support offered, visit our Student Support Services web page: https://www.stir.ac.uk/student-life/support-wellbeing/student-support-services/.